philosophizing – Horse Listening

Take the Credit – Bad AND Good

"The superior man blames himself. The inferior man blames others." - Don Shula

How many times have you ridden your horse and not achieved the results you wanted?

You automatically run through all the possible reasons, and adjust accordingly:

Maybe the higher than normal winds were causing too much tension in the horse?

Was the saddle positioned too far back, or the bit not adjusted correctly?

Did you use your leg aids to support the inside rib cage?

Were your reins were too long, bumping the horse in the mouth?

Did you lean too far forward?

Was the footing too hard?

Maybe your timing was off - were you aiding when the inside hind leg was off the ground?

And it goes on and on. You challenge yourself, correct yourself, question yourself and maybe even chastise yourself. You try, persevere, develop, grow. You do improve, and your horse improves along with you.

Yet, when things go right, do you take the credit?

Or do you put it down to the horse having a good day?

In our quest for balance (not just on the kind on the back of the horse), it is essential for us to look at our achievements from both angles. Yes, when things go wrong, you are responsible to analyze/scrutinize/change what you are doing. On the other hand, when things do go right, you need to relish that feeling of fulfillment/accomplishment/growth and allow it to bolster you to new heights.

Horses have a way of making you earn your progress, but once it happens, the rewards are eternal (on all planes - physical, mental, emotional - but that is another topic). You discover that you can repeat the positive results over again, and better yet, on the next horse you ride. The time you put into this horse will reap rewards for the future - for you and your next horses.

So... take the credit - bad and good, and be sure to enjoy the ride at all times!

* Thanks to J.V. for inspiration for this post!

*******

Read more!

What You Ought to Know About Instant Gratification in Horse Riding: There is NO SUCH THING! Why not???

Blueprinting: The Good, The Bad and The Ugly: Why is it essential that you learn how to ride correctly in the first place?

Demystifying "Contact" In Horse Riding: Sometimes it feels like the word “contact” has other-wordly connotations.

Horseback Riders Do Nothing Anyway! Well, at least, that’s what “they” say. But we know differently, don’t we?

Doing It Because It Makes You Feel Good

When was the last time you did something just to make yourself feel good?

Have you ever done something around/with/for your horses in a "feel-good" way for YOU?

I bet you did! Realistically speaking, our horses are our moments of doing something for ourselves, even if we are doing it with our four-legged friends. So essentially, everything about horses is about our selves too.

So how do the horses fit in? Do they benefit from our benevolence? Or do they become mere objects of our affections, there to make us happy when we feel like it, and dropped to the wayside when we are done with them?

When it comes to horses, we all have differences in opinions and various ways of doing just about anything. As the saying goes, ask twenty-five horse people the same question, and you'll get twenty-five answers! Often, opposite beginnings result in similar endings, so even if you do things a little differently than others, the end result is similar if not completely identical. It is true that in horse keeping, different paths may lead to the same end.

However, when we analyze why we do things, we realize that there are several justifications behind our decision-making steps. If you are asked to explain your rationale, you have perfectly good reasons for why you do things the way you do them.

For example, you might put a rain sheet on your horse in order to give him that extra protection in the still-cool and possibly rainy days of early spring or late fall. Others might say that horses will "survive" just fine without the rain sheets, but some of us will put the sheets on, if for nothing else, so we feel like we did something to create more comfort for our horses (of course, blankets might also help overall coat and health condition).

How about hand-feeding the horse a treat? Horses generally welcome such "special" moments with their humans, especially when something tastes good! Without a doubt, the horse's reaction to treats is different from the human's response - the horse welcomes the tasty treat simply for the taste, while the human undergoes emotional reverberations thanks to the enthusiastic reception by the horse!

Necessity Versus Pleasure

In each case, what is most important is not what is being done, but why it is being done. Dig below the surface to unearth why you made the decision you did. Was it an essential need of the horse, or did you do it mostly because it made you feel good?

If your answer is the latter, keep these two things in mind:

1. So long as we know why we are doing things, then it is fine to do them. If you feel good when you do something, then it is worthwhile in its own right, if for nothing else, then for the emotional release it gives to you, the horse owner. In this case, you know you are doing it for your own sake.

2. What you are doing does not harm the horse. Flash-back to the hand-feeding scene, and notice that although you are making the horse happy when you give him a treat, you also may be teaching the horse to take nibbling to the next step - and develop a biting response. In this case, the harm to the horse might outweigh the pleasure you feel. When there is possible harm involved to either yourself or the horse, then you should revisit your decision.

This need for us to "feel good" when we do things for our horses can span everything from feeding hay (too much can be almost as harmful as too little) to riding (riding too long can harm as much as riding too little).

Keep the horse in mind. When you make decisions around the horse, are you making them for the sake of the horse, or for your own sake? And if you are making the decisions for your sake, admit it, accept it (in other words, know that the horse could be perfectly fine otherwise), and feel good about it!

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New! Horse Listening – The Book: Stepping Forward to Effective Riding

Available as an eBook or paperback.

Other articles you might enjoy!

Too Good To Be True? Finding Your Horse’s Happy Place: Did you know that through riding alone, you can improve the quality of your horse’s life? All horses respond positively to enjoyable exercise….

Speaking Horse: (a.k.a. “Pushing the Envelope”): It is important to know that speaking “horse” doesn’t mean getting all cuddly and cute. Read to find out how to “speak” so that horses appreciate your presence.

Quit to Persevere: When quitting is the right thing to do.

The Truth About Balance: It isn’t only about balance in the saddle – find balance in all areas of the horse’s life.

Horseback Riders Do Nothing Anyway!

Well, at least, that's what "they" say.

But we know differently, don't we?

We know how much time it takes to develop the balance and timing to move as a unit with the horse.

We know about the frustration and tears we expend when we work so hard to achieve something and still it does not arrive.

We know the pain we must go through - literally and figuratively - to develop enough "saddle time" to feel even the beginnings of unity and harmony with the horse.

It's like a picture.

Every time you watch a horse and rider, you are seeing where they are in their development as a partnership at that moment in time. Their strengths as well as their weaknesses are but a snapshot of their progress, a simple moment in time after where they have been and before where they are going.

The trick is to know that the picture they currently present is malleable and ever moving onward, like a flowing river. The challenges they have right now are going to drift away with practice and new ones will take their places.

The unlimited potential for learning and self-development is the never-ending call of horseback riding.

To those of you who insist that the rider does nothing

When you see the rider that looks like she is "doing nothing", please be aware that:

her timing is so well-developed that she is riding "in" the movement of the horse, intimately intertwined within his gait so as to dance into his rhythm.
she is incredibly fit and strong through her core muscles, as well as self-aware of the balance and positioning of every cell of her body from tip of the head to the toes, so that the horse's movements do not lurch her out of the saddle.
she knows when and how to allow the expression of the horse to come through and then capably rides along with him.
she has developed a level of communication with her horse so sophisticated that it rivals the best, most successful social media platform known in existence to humankind!
she has more dedication and self-discipline than many who are watching her

In fact, us horseback riders are always in the hunt for looking like we are doing nothing at all! Because we know that an effortless, free-flowing, lighter-than-air ride truly is what we're aiming for...

...and we do not really mind if those onlookers think we are just being passengers on a magnificent animal who is willing to share his talents with us!

Buy the book!

Horse Listening – Book 4: 20-Minute Exercises To Add Variety To Your Riding Routine

Stop wandering round and round aimlessly!

Horse Listening Book 4 is a compilation of the best patterns that have been shared on the Horse Listening Blog. The book is divided into five sections: Warm-Ups, Left and Right, Straightness, Suppleness and Collection. Each section has specific exercises and theory based on its topic.

But there's more!

There is a Special Center Section dedicated to only Transitions - something that we can all work on throughout our riding careers. And finally, scattered throughout the book are chapters that clearly explain theory, technique and skills that can help improve the featured exercises of teach Section.

Use these 20-minute exercises!

Available as an eBook or paperback.

When Do You Start Riding Your Horse?

Looking — How you "talk" to the horse makes all the difference

"When do you start riding your horse?"

This question was being posed to me by a very respected and horse-wise mentor one day long ago, early in my riding development.

I thought about it for some time, and responded, "When I lead the horse to the riding ring." During the time I'm leading the horse to the ring, I usually start mentally running through my goals for the day. I quickly review my last ride and think of the small "next steps" I'm going to address.

She stopped me in my tracks.

"That's already too late," she said.

*****

These words have stayed with me to this very day. She emphasized that "riding" is not limited to just being on the horse's back. Whether you are leading a horse from or to the paddock, grooming, or just playing in the round pen, you are "riding". Riding a horse is about EVERYTHING!

The truth about horses is that they do not differentiate between riding and handling and just plain socializing. In their world, every contact you have with them is first about herd dynamics.

Whether you like it or not, or know it or not, your horse is in vigorous conversation with you from moment you start interacting with him. And the dominant question in his mind is, "Are you a leader?"

Your physical responses then point him to his answer.

*****

How to be a leader

1. Attitude matters. Be sure in your step. Know where you are going, and kindly but firmly expect the horse to come along with you.

2. Establish your "personal space." In the herd, horses regularly test each other's boundaries by pushing into personal space. While you lead your horse, feed him or groom him, be aware of the slight tests your horse puts you through.

3. Ask questions of your horse. Will you put a foot here? Will you get out of my space? Will you let me give your head a long and squishy hug?

4. Always follow through with your requests. If you happen to get a "no" for an answer (it does happen all the time!), you have to be ready to continue that particular conversation until you get the "yes". If you accept the first "no", then the next and the next, you will be sabotaging your relationship with your horse. And he will know it before you do.

******

My mentor looked at me squarely. I realized then that she had KNOWN what my answer was going to be all along. She wanted to make sure that I understood clearly about the horse-human relationship.

I hesitantly asked her, "When do you start riding your horse?"

Her answer: "When I pull into the driveway."

So, when do you start riding your horse?

Buy the book for many more riding tips! Horse Listening Book 2 - Forward And Round To Training Success

Stop printing off the articles! Your favorite training articles are compiled in this beautifully bound paperback book. Have everything at your fingertips - this book can be taken to the barn as a quick refresher or leisurely read at home.

Signed Author Copies available - perfect personalized gifts!

From the book:

"Regardless of discipline, what would be the most significant effect a rider would want to have on her horse?

We all want our horses to improve in their athletic

development, skill acquisition and connectedness. Much of our rider development and training efforts go into working toward our show or personal goals....

But the best riders aspire to do one essential thing each and every day, regardless of goals and lesson plans: they work hard to improve their horse’s way of going.

Because proper balance and weight carriage is essential to a horse’s longevity. Each and every minute of each and every ride has the potential to contribute to your horse’s health and well-being.

Or not."

Just as with all the Horse Listening Collection Books, this book is focused on helping the rider improve for the sake of the horse. But this book goes deeper into the best training articles from the blog - horse-centered theory, strategies and ideas you can try with your own horse.

The book begins with the horse's hind end (!), considers the horse's back, moves on to rider development, and fills it all in with the fundamentals of horse riding so your horse can be:

happier in his body

happier in his "work"

better balanced all-around

Available as an eBook or paperback.

When “Good Enough” Just Isn’t Good Enough in Horseback Riding

We all like to say that we are "good enough" at what we do - and riding is no different. We ride our horses, get on, ride on the trails, ride in the ring, get off and do it again another day.

We like to think that what we are doing is good and true and accurate and improves our horses... at least, in our opinion!

So what if the horse forever shies at the same corner in the same way under the same conditions? We can easily avoid that corner. So what if our horse's coat condition isn't just "perfect"? The shine and sheen you can get from a coat is overrated anyway, as long as he is getting fed. Why bother with improving the transitions just a little bit when we do get from the trot to the canter eventually? ANY canter is better than no canter.

And seriously, what does it matter if the horse never really responds when we want him to? We can cut him some slack and let things happen when he feels like it... who does that hurt, really? We get our enjoyment from riding whether he is point-perfect or not.

Hiding "behind the barn" hurts not only ourselves but our also our horses.

We fall into ruts and routines that prevent us from going further in our education. We get used to running into the same old trouble, and rather than challenge the status quo, we:

- suffer the problems.

- avoid the circumstances.

- "victimize" ourselves into thinking that in order to get our ride in, we have to go through those rituals.

We come up with all sorts of excuses to explain why we don't want to or can't get past the problem.

Have you ever heard someone say, "The horse feels like it," or "The horse doesn't enjoy it," and they truly seem to believe that nothing can be done to change the situation?

Why we must get out of our backyards.

Unfortunately, this type of thinking is what sets apart the people who "do" and the people who simply don't. The ones who do progress and improve and develop are the ones who can set aside their egos and take a leap of faith - in themselves, in their horses, in their peers and even in their coaches.

They are the ones who get up early in the morning and set off for the show - despite being nervous, stressed or unsure. They are the ones who take an undesirable result and turn it into a learning experience. They are prepared to put it all "out there" and head off to a clinic where a multitude of faces watch their every move and an unfamiliar (but respected) clinician picks apart their skills.

There is no way to improve other than to put ourselves "out there".

When we head to the show, or the clinic, or especially the riding lesson, we are putting ourselves in a position to be scrutinized, compared and even evaluated. We expose our skills and training and get feedback.

We learn that perhaps there is a way to get past that spooky corner. Perhaps the riding ritual we find ourselves in can be redirected into something positive and useful. Maybe high-quality grooming can be an accomplishment in itself, and kept up at home. And we realize that it might be in fact possible to ask our horse to respond more promptly, and discover that we both enjoy the improved communication.

The learning curve can be steep and may make a big impact. It may be uncomfortable at times, difficult to be sure and possibly may turn out to be exhilarating. But one thing is constant - that self-improvement occurs. "Good enough" starts to become "better". We progress past the learning plateau and move on to new heights.

And the horse is the one to benefit.

Other posts you might enjoy:

Speaking "Horse" (a.k.a. Pushing the Envelope): You must learn how to understand the language of the horse.

Ask 25 Horse People One Question...: ... and get 25 different answers! What to do with all those opinions.

To Lesson or Not To Lesson? That isn't even a question!

On Enjoying the Path: You have to enjoy the "work" in riding and not just the "fun"!

How Do You Develop ‘Feel’ in Horseback Riding?

By three methods we may learn wisdom:

First, by reflection, which is noblest;

Second, by imitation, which is easiest;

and third by experience, which is the bitterest.

~Confucius

Confucius might well have been writing about "feel" in his quote above. Just replace the word 'wisdom' with 'feel' and you will get a generally good idea of the path.

Born to feel?

Many people say that it is impossible to learn how to 'feel' in riding. They say either you have it, or you don't. They insist that people who can 'feel' are essentially born with it, and others will never find it regardless of their attempts.

But you know this can not possibly be true. You have likely watched as people improved their riding skills over time and witnessed for yourself that (correct) practice DOES make perfect (or at the very least, significant improvement).

Of course, certain requirements have to be in place:

- you need regular instruction.

- you must commit to consistent practice.

- you must be willing to hear and respond to repeated feedback.

- you must have the intrinsic motivation to strive for more at all times.

Most importantly, you need to have the openness of heart and mind to 'find' that feel - especially during the first time, since you will not particularly know what the feel feels like!

How to find 'feel'?

Do like Confucius said!

First, you must start with an idea. Before you will even know what to feel for, you must get some input from a more experienced source. Perhaps you have an instructor that puts emphasis on describing the feel for you. Maybe you can read about the feel from an expertly written book or article.

The difficulty about this stage is that you don't know what you don't know... and to break the cycle, you need to reach out to someone who does know. The road to knowing (or feeling, in this case), is trusting that there is something "out there" that you don't even know exists! Then you need the teaser idea to get you started, to start (figuratively) groping around to find that feel.

Second, watch, learn and do. There is no learning that is more successful than having a chance to watch someone ride, and then trying it yourself. Imitate! Ideally, you would be able to ride in the company of other experienced riders and try to mimic their actions. Even better, ride with your instructor and listen to her as she explains what she is doing, what she is feeling, and what the end result looks like in the horse.

Then it is your turn to try and search for the feeling that will produce the final result. Unfortunately, you will have to get it wrong many times before you get the first taste of correct feel. At long last, after your instructor explained the skills, and then the feel, you might get a brief moment when it all falls together - and you FEEL!

Then, it all falls apart again!

Now you need to develop experience. After you get it that one time, you might not get it again for a while. You have to trouble-shoot - hit and miss - until you find the feel the second time. Each time, it gets easier to repeat, and you can duplicate the feel sooner and more frequently. Sometimes, you will go through a stage where you simply cannot reproduce the feel (and result) without your instructor's steady guidance from the ground. You might be successful for the last twenty minutes of the lesson, but not be able to reproduce the skill on your own.

It WILL get worse before it gets better. As Confucius indicates, learning through experience is "bitterest!"

Be patient. Getting to a point where the feel becomes part of your blueprint takes time and repetition. Persist through the uncoordinated moments, try again, and keep searching for that evasive feel. It really does get easier with time and practice.

If you can ride with feel, you will be able to respond immediately to your horse's needs, be able to avoid problems before they occur, and be present in the ride but out of your horse's way at the same time. And, to top it off, your horse will thank you for it!

How did you, or are you, developing 'feel' in horse riding?

Buy the book for many more riding tips! Horse Listening – The Book: Stepping Forward to Effective Riding

Personally signed books available! Give the best gift for the horse lover in your life (or for yourself!

). Send me a message for more information. fwdnrnd@gmail.com

From the first book in the Horse Listening Collection: Horse Listening, The Book

"There are many reasons why we enjoy riding horses. Maybe one of the most appealing facets of riding is the sense of freedom: freedom from our own limitations, freedom from gravity, freedom to (literally) roam the Earth. Time stands still while we have the privilege of feeling movement from the back of our four-legged friend.

Riding gives us the place to just be.

Of course, there are other purposes too. Some of us revel in the challenge of learning the skills required to becoming a good team member of this unlikely duo. Riding is like no other sport or recreational pursuit simply because of the equine partner that must not only carry us, but also do so effortlessly and gracefully. As we develop our specific skill sets, we also grow as human beings in character, emotional maturity and mental acuity.

But there is one other motivation that drives some of us to persevere in the never-ending learning process that is horseback riding: improving the horse. As your own skills develop, you begin to realize that not only can you meet your own needs through riding, but also that you can even become an instrument of benefit for the horse."

And so begins the book that reflects the most important learning I have had in all of my riding years: that I want to be the best rider I can be for the sake of my horses.

This book is geared toward the rider:

- the rider's motivations

- the essential skills for the rider

- some specific strategies

- solutions to common problems

- and the results: the great horsey moments we get to experience

Along the way, you will find chapters that discuss everything from the seat to the leg aids to the reins, discussions on half-halts, imbalance, halts, straightness and more!

Special in this book are the "In The Ring" sections that give specific suggestions based on the preceding chapters. Take these to the barn to try with your own horse!

Available as an eBook or paperback.

Too Good To Be True? Finding Your Horse’s “Happy Place”

Did you know that through riding, you can help your horse achieve a happy, content outlook on life? Sounds ridiculously far-fetched? Too good to be true?

We have already discussed the Top Nine Ways to Prevent Your Horse From Finding His “Happy Place” in Riding in our previous post - so this time, we're going to tell you how to find the "happy place" we all so desire for our horses.* The ideas below are written with riding in mind.**

Try a few of these tips and see the results you get from your horse. Then comment below and share your insights.

The outside of the horse mirrors his internal state.

Horses don't lie. Without a doubt, you can clearly "read" how the horse feels just by watching him being ridden (or riding him yourself - then, you get even more feedback). Essentially, the horse's "outline" tells you his state of mind. Of course, you need to know what to look for, but once you can identify the communication signs, you will know exactly what is going on inside the mind of the horse.

A round, forward-moving, enthusiastic horse is in his happy place. His ears will be lightly forward (occasionally flicking back and forth on and off his rider) and he will be moving with expression. He looks like he is enjoying what he is doing, and moving on his own initiative.

In contrast, the unhappy horse is reluctant, sluggish, ears back (not necessarily pinned), and looking like the movement is belabored. The strides are short, the back is hollow and the horse is not "using" himself well enough to be comfortable under the rider. He will have a tendency to be on the forehand, and inconsistently responsive.

Have a consistent "yes" and "no".

Horses are just like the rest of us: they thrive on positive feedback. In establishing your riding parameters, you must communicate "yes" (harmonizing) and "no" (resisting) regularly and consistently. In fact, you might need to communicate one or the other message as quickly as stride to stride! Be sure to communicate frequently enough so that your horse won't end up wondering - what am I doing wrong?

Many riders use a low, soft "goooood" voice aid to reinforce the correct response from the horse, however, the same effect can be gained by saying "yes" through the body. If you can find a "yes" answer physically (release of your joints, following through the seat versus resisting, or allowing through all your aids), you can communicate the "yes" message faster than you can say it. And this is the way your horse can find his happy place - because he knows where he stands and gets regular and consistent feedback quickly enough to be able to respond to it and find his place of comfort.

Listen for the snort and feel for the licking and chewing.

There is no more obvious sign of the horse in his happy place other than the snort. A little snort is a good sign, a loud, wet, heart-felt series of snorts that rock you out of the saddle is ideal! (Have a snorting contest with your riding partner: who can be the first to get a snort out of their horse? Who can get the most snorts out of their horse?!)

In general, after the snort session, you will find the horse licking and chewing like he just ate something exquisite and tasty - and yes, the horse can do all the above even while trotting and cantering. The final sign of contentment is the saliva that coats around the lips of the horse. A dry mouth usually denotes discomfort or stress of some sort; drool is a key indicator of "happy place" heaven!

Do something fun!

When the "learning" part of your session is over, or if you want to take a brief reprieve after a difficult stretch of work, let the horse do something he likes. One horse might enjoy a stretchy trot; another prefers a lengthen; still another gets a kick (not literally!) out of a flying change! Every horse has one or more favorite exercises - listen carefully to your horse to identify his preference, and then use that movement as a moment of celebration!

Look for any excuse to celebrate!

Everyone loves a celebration! Don't leave your horse out - invite him to celebrate with you at every opportunity; in fact, look for excuses to celebrate! Did he just struggle through a particularly difficult movement? Celebrate! Did he lick and chew and release his topline for the first time in the ride? Celebrate!

I'm sure you're starting to get the idea. Let me know if you gave any of these tips a try, or if you have any other "happy place" tips you can share. Happy riding!

* The assumption is that all the other bare necessities (feed, shelter, etc.) as discussed in the previous article have already been met.

** Note: The "happy place" discussed here is the one your horse can find in the ring, during the lesson/workout/training session. There are many other ways to change up the routine (e.g. go for a trail ride) but that is a completely different topic!

Read our guest post on www.proequinegrooms.com

Horse Listening was invited to do a guest post on www.proequinegrooms.com - read to see our "listening" twist to grooming (and lost more good info on the site too)!

Click here: Zen and the Art of Grooming

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Don’t miss a single issue of Horse Listening! If you like what you are reading, become a subscriber and receive updates when new Horse Listening articles are published! Your email address will not be used on any other distribution list. Subscribe to Horse Listening by Email

Horses. Riding. Life.

Category: philosophizing

Take the Credit – Bad AND Good

Doing It Because It Makes You Feel Good

Horseback Riders Do Nothing Anyway!

Well, at least, that's what "they" say.

Finally! The Ultimate Rider-Centered Program!

Buy the book!

Horse Listening – Book 4: 20-Minute Exercises To Add Variety To Your Riding Routine

When Do You Start Riding Your Horse?

Finally! The Ultimate Rider-Centered Program!

Buy the book for many more riding tips! Horse Listening Book 2 - Forward And Round To Training Success

When “Good Enough” Just Isn’t Good Enough in Horseback Riding

Finally! The Ultimate Rider-Centered Program!

How Do You Develop ‘Feel’ in Horseback Riding?

How to find 'feel'?

Do like Confucius said!

Finally! The Ultimate Rider-Centered Program!

Buy the book for many more riding tips! Horse Listening – The Book: Stepping Forward to Effective Riding

Too Good To Be True? Finding Your Horse’s “Happy Place”

Finally! The Ultimate Rider-Centered Program!

Buy the book for many more riding tips! Horse Listening – The Book: Stepping Forward to Effective Riding

Read our guest post on www.proequinegrooms.com